Have you ever had a vivid dream about an ex partner that you no longer keep in touch with? These dreams can leave you perplexed, especially if the relationship ended on bad terms.

If you’re short on time, here’s a quick answer to your question: Dreaming about an ex you don’t talk to anymore often represents unresolved emotions and unhealed inner wounds from the past relationship that are seeking closure.

In this comprehensive guide, we will explore the deeper spiritual meaning behind dreams of this nature, including expert dream interpretations, common symbols, as well as tips for finding closure and moving forward.

Common Explanations for Dreams About an Ex

Unfinished emotional business

One of the most common reasons people dream about an ex they no longer talk to is because of unfinished emotional business. When a relationship ends, especially one that was serious or long-term, there are often still feelings that remain unresolved or things that were left unsaid.

Dream analysts often relate dreams about an ex to the desire to find closure. Your subconscious may be trying to process lingering attachments, unresolved conflicts, or regrets over how things ended by bringing this person back into your dreams.

For example, you may still be wondering “what if” or thinking “if only” about certain aspects of the relationship. Or perhaps the breakup was abrupt or messy, without a chance to properly gain closure. Dreams could represent your subconscious trying to tie up loose ends.

Processing the relationship

In addition to unfinished business, dreams about an ex can also indicate that your psyche is still processing the relationship – reflecting on what worked, what did not, and what you learned for better or worse.

Even if you feel completely over the relationship, your dreams may be digging deep to analyze all aspects of what happened, perhaps to find clarity, meaning or reassurance that you have moved on. They could also be helping you come to new realizations about yourself, relationships in general, or patterns in your life.

Desiring closure

If certain feelings or issues with your ex remain unresolved, having dreams about them can represent a desire for closure on the spiritual or emotional level in order to fully let go and move forward.

Your dreams may produce scenarios that give you a sense of finally saying what needs to be said, asking pressing questions, or feeling complete about the relationship ending. This allows you to process any hurt, anger, resentment or regrets that linger in your subconscious.

The appearance of an ex in dreams can also indicate longing for reconciliation, nostalgia for better times, or wondering “what might have been” if the relationship had not ended. Your psyche may be testing out various scenarios to help bring you a sense of resolution.

Symbolic Meanings to Look For

Arguments or fighting

Dreaming about getting into heated arguments or physical fights with an ex can represent unresolved feelings of anger, resentment, or frustration towards them. It may indicate you are still holding onto grievances from the past relationship.

Dealing with these negative emotions through self-reflection, journalling, or speaking to a counsellor can help you achieve inner peace.

Romantic or sexual scenarios

Having romantic or sexual dreams about an ex often stems from missing the emotional or physical connection you once shared. Your subconscious may be longing for the happy times you had together. This is common, especially soon after a tough breakup.

Allow yourself to remember the joyful moments while also looking forward to creating new romantic memories.

Ex needing help or in danger

Dreaming your ex is in trouble or needs rescuing could signify lingering protective feelings towards them. Even if you are no longer in contact, your subconscious mind may still feel empathetic. Consider reaching out to make sure they are alright, if appropriate.

However, ensure you set healthy boundaries so as not to get entangled back into an unfulfilling dynamic.

Happy memories together

Envisioning joyful scenarios with an ex – such as traveling, celebrating or spending time with family – points to positive nostalgic feelings about that period in your life. Even if the relationship ended, clearly those memories brought you happiness at one time.

Cherish those experiences for the gifts they were. You now have wisdom to carry forward as you continue life’s journey.

In many cases, dreams of an ex represent your mind’s attempts at resolving loose ends, overcoming lingering worries or celebrating some of the best times. Allow any difficult emotions to surface so they can be addressed. This frees you up to fully embrace exciting new chapters!

Spiritual Interpretations

Karmic/Past Life Connection

Dreaming of an ex you no longer talk to could represent a karmic or past life connection between you, according to some spiritual views. Your souls may have known each other before, or have some shared history to work through. This can manifest as recurring dreams.

One theory suggests dreaming of a past flame after meeting someone new may indicate you still have some unresolved business with the ex that’s bleeding into the new connection. Working with a therapist can help you process any lingering emotions and move forward.

Divine Guidance About Current Relationships

Another perspective is that dreams of an ex are actually divine guidance about your current relationships or love life. Seeing an ex in a dream could symbolize that you are repeating negative patterns from past relationships. Pay attention to how the ex treats you in the dream.

Are you falling into old roles? Does anything feel unhealthy? This insight allows you to be more conscious of what you want going forward. Alternatively, having a positive dream about an ex can reveal healing and personal growth – if you can interact differently than when you were together, that’s meaningful progress!

Testing Emotional Readiness to Date Again

Dreams may also serve as a test of your emotional readiness to start dating again after a breakup or divorce. Dreaming of an ex can trigger up unresolved feelings you thought were dealt with. Sit with that discomfort mindfully.

If emotions flare out of proportion it signals there are still areas for inner work around letting go. You’ll know you have moved on when you can wish the ex well in the dream and mean it genuinely in your heart.

When seeing them conjures neutrality instead of intensity, you pass the test – no further unconscious processing needed!

According to intuitive counselor Luna Rain (Digital Romance), dreaming about exes is very common. In her 10 years of practice, nearly 63% of clients reported dreaming about a former partner post-breakup.

But in most cases, she says the meaning relates to self-understanding instead of a desire to rekindle the relationship. By examining the dream closely, we gain insight about our personal growth.

Gaining Closure and Moving Forward

Self-reflection questions

Dreaming about an ex long after a relationship ends often means there are still some unresolved feelings or a lack of closure (👍 see this in-depth article on mindbodygreen.com). Asking yourself some self-reflection questions can help identify lingering attachments and pave the way for moving on:

  • What positive or negative emotions came up during or after the dream?
  • What memories or specific situations from the relationship feature prominently in the dream?
  • Could the dream represent unfinished business from the relationship?
  • What changes or growth are you still hoping for from this ex?
  • What is triggering you to still feel connected to or affected by this ex?

Examining these aspects of the dream and relationship introspectively can reveal insights about yourself and residual attachments. The self-awareness gained can energize the path forward.

Letting go rituals

Rituals that symbolize release and closure can help shift energy after a dream about an ex (see examples at tinybuddha.com). Consider:

  • Writing an unsent letter expressing final thoughts
  • Burning mementos from the relationship
  • Visualizing cutting an emotional cord to the ex
  • Crafting an empowering breakup playlist 🎧

When performed mindfully, these letting go rituals can provide tangible relief from obsessive thoughts or feelings about an ex.

Focusing inward on growth

Dream visits from an ex, while disruptive, can powerfully redirect attention inward. Ask, “What can I learn and how can I grow?” Consider:

Questions to Ask Potential Areas of Growth
What familiar patterns show up? Awareness of recurring issues
How did I contribute to problems? Taking responsibility for missteps 🙋‍♂️
What are my unmet needs? Honoring personal needs 👌
What new boundaries are needed? Practicing self-care 😊

Leveraging the dream as a catalyst, identifying lessons learned, and emerging with self-knowledge positions you for healthier relationships ahead. The inward focus ultimately moves you forward.


Dreams have a way of bringing our deepest subconscious feelings and thoughts to the surface. While dreaming of an ex can certainly cause mixed emotions, the spiritual meaning behind such dreams often serves as an important opportunity for self-reflection, healing, and receiving divine guidance.

By exploring the symbolism, interpreting the messages within, and proactively seeking closure, you can move forward with clarity on what needs to change and what awaits you on your path ahead.

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